Okay, I know some of you are going to disagree with this but here is the cold hard truth, men and women are not the same and men and women cannot be friends long-term without some type of romantic feelings being involved.
First of all, you really do a disservice to the opposite sex when you put them in the trash that is the friend zone. If you like them enough to be a close friend, you have some type of attraction to them whether you want to admit it or not. If they are such a close friend you tell them your innermost secrets, love spending time with them and think about them regularly, you are in denial. The basis of a romantic relationship is having a strong emotional connection. This is why so many of our relationships fail. We go looking toward other people instead of those that are closest to us and while we may have some type of superficial attraction we have nothing in common and there isn't an emotional bond. That best friend of the opposite sex has everything you are looking for in a romantic relationship.
Granted sometimes we have feelings for our best friend and we never say a word because we fear we are going to mess up the dynamics of the relationship. Well guess what? As soon as you started developing feelings for your friend, the dynamics already changed. Isn't it true that when they talk about a significant other you may nod your head in support but it just crushes you. Isn't it true here you are offering emotional support to your friend but he/she seemingly doesn't notice you? All of that hurts badly. You are taking on the role of basically a spouse but get nothing in return. If you have romantic feelings, you need to tell them. Yes, there is a risk but you are miserable in the current state of things anyway. If they are unwilling to give it a chance, then you can stay in the relationship and suffer or you can walk away. Yes walking is going to hurt but staying gives you zero chance of ever healing and that is a hard, hard lesson. Plus when you walk that is the one thing that can change the dynamic because suddenly your opposite sex friend may actually realize what value you brought to them and start seeing you differently.
No one wants to be the male version of a female's best female friends or the female version of a male's best male friends. It is not fair and it hurts. Also it is not fair to the person who may be in a relationship with your best opposite sex friend. They are likely to get jealous which is going to hurt the relationship and then you have to choose which often means someone is getting left out and that simply is not right.
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